“Truths for Mature Humans”

I thought this was pretty funny. Most of these things have gone through my mind at one point or another.
*click on the photo to enlarge

image via pinterest

1. I think part of best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is a great need for sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You ever know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don’t want to have to restart my collection…again.
13. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. “Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will never wash this – ever.
15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? **** it) but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?
16. I hate leave my hose confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste?
17. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
20. I with Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.
21. Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea when the heck was going on when I first saw it.
22. I would rather try to carry 10 overloaded plastic bags in each hang than take 2 trips to bring in my groceries in.
23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.
24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
25. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?
26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber and dumber every year?
29. There’s no worse feeling that that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate bicyclists.
31. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d be my *** everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
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gossip girl finale

I think a part of me may have died a little tonight…
All of you that know me and watched the show know why.
🙁 R.I.P. Chuck and Blair.
And of course, shocked at the ending. Both of the final parts…eeek.
However, I’m just so obsessed with all of the dresses from the finale. Gorgeous. Even though I do not like Charlie or Georgina, they looked amazing.

“The greatest loves are the craziest loves” – Blair
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I’ve decided.

Chuck Bass is my city boyfriend and Blake Shelton is my country boy.

I think I will always be in love with Chuck. He’s cocky and arrogant, yes…but come on, what girl doesn’t fall for a guy like that every now and again. You want your guy to be a little bit like that right? But he’s so cute to Blair when they’re in love. And what girl doesn’t want a guy to be completely in love with them and go after them the way he is lately. (Ahh this show is frustrating me so much ps!)

But then there is Blake…move over Miranda Lambert…I’m gonna steal him! I love his voice, I love that he’s country, and he’s so hot! Also he seems super funny. He was on Chelsey Lately talking about “The Voice” (which by the way I’ve been loving!) and he was cracking me up. He just seems like a real man. Not the guy who is going to want to help you decorate the house…he’d want to build the house. Ha. Anyway, I’ve already secretly wanted a cowboy. So Blake, you get to be my new bf. Sound good to you? Great.

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newspaper nails

I’m going to learn how to do this.

1. Put on nail polish and let dry.

2. Dip fingernail in alcohol-basically any will do, vodka is suggested.

3. Press a strip of newspaper big enough to cover the whole nail on to your alcohol soaked nail.

4. Pull off slowly and be really impressed with yourself.

5. Paint top coat if desired.

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